Asian American learned Chinese to write emotional essay to Chinese parents - Do not immigrate to America, your kids will suffer.
http://bbs.wenxuecity.com/znjy/3435416.html
Don't forfeit the future of your sons and daughters just for the sake of realizing your "dreams." Fathers and mothers who would rashly emigrate to America should carefully consider the actual merits and drawbacks of immigration for their children. (不要光为了实现你的“梦想”而断送子女的未来。轻易移民美国的父母应该慎重考虑移民会对孩子的具体利弊)
Hello everybody, I'm very happy to have this chance to join this literature forum. As a Chinese male who grew up in America, I'd like to share with everybody, especially parents, the negative effects of immigrating to America in a child's early years. Hopefully this will encourage future parents planning on moving to America to reconsider what giving up a Chinese upbringing and background for their kids would entail, the long term problems this would create, and then act from there. (大家好，很高兴有机会加入文学城的论坛。作为一位在美国长大的中国男生，我想与大家（特别是父母）分享一下早年移民美国对孩子的负面影响，希望能鼓励将来考虑移民的父母三思而再行，慎重思索来美国让孩子抛弃了中国背景会给他们产生什么长远问题)
For many years now, moving to America has been the life long dream of Chinese parents. These parents believe that America's air is good, the quality of life high, people make lots of money, and most importantly, that it has better prospects for their children's future than China. As a result parents sacrifice everything, stinting on no expenses to take their kids to America, or even giving birth directly in America. In this way their children can obtain American passports, and from birth become the long desired "American." Countless Chinese parents believe that due to their kids' young age, they would have a strong ability assimilate, and growing up in America would afford them countless beneficial experiences and opportunities. "For the children's future" has been one of the primary reasons for Chinese families to immigrate. (多年以来，移民到美国是中国父母一生的梦想。这些父母认为美国空气好，生活水平高，收入高，和最重要的，对孩子的未来比在中国好。所以尽早想不惜一切地把孩子带到美国，或者直接来美国生更好。这样孩子直接能获得美国护照，从出生那天就升华为梦寐以求的 “美国人”。无数的中国父母认为孩子因为年龄小而适应能力强，在美国长大一定会享受无数的色彩和发展机会。 “为了孩子的未来” 被中国家长当作最重要的移民原因之一。)
However after many years of pondering and training, I have discovered that the vast majority of Chinese parents who decided to take their kids to America had no clue as to what American culture, or Western culture in general, was actually like. Nor did they have any idea what kind of negative effects growing up in such a culture would have on Chinese kids, and the huge impact it would have on their future sense of belonging, self worth, networking, and career prospects. I myself moved with my parents at the age of 7 from Shanxi province to eastern America, grew up there, and became intimately familiar with American culture. Upon reaching adulthood I worked with all my power to recuperate and patch up my Chinese to share with you all views of an ambitious and hardworking 30 year old. That is, before rushing to move to America, parents should further and deepen their understanding what the actual choice of emigrating means for their children, using empirical observations. Too many Chinese parents just look at China's many problems with corruption and malpractices, and believe that if they just move to America, every problem will just magically sort itself out, once and for all. But in reality, the truth is far more complicated than what these parents could imagine, and far more miserable as well. (但是通过多年的思索，尝试，和熏陶，我发现大部分中国父母决定把年幼的子女带到美国的时候，实际上根本没弄清楚在美国文化（甚至西方文化）长大究竟对华裔孩子到底有多么大的负面影响，对他们的归属感，认同感，搭建人脉圈子的能力，将来的职业生涯的发展，有多大的打击。本作者，作为一个７岁就和父母从老家山西移民到美国东岸，长在美国，深度了解美国文化，而成年之后拼命补回中文的一个有事业野心和打拼精神的30岁小伙子，想和大家分享一下我的看法：就是，父母急急匆匆移民美国之前，应该更全面的了解一下此抉择对孩子，甚至孩子长大离家之后，的确切，客观的影响。太多中国父母光看到了中国社会的诸多弊端，觉得来美国就能魔术般得解决所有的问题，一劳永逸。事实并非如此，真相实际上比好多移民父母想象的更复杂，更悲惨。)
First off, Chinese parents itching to move to America, for the most part, have no idea as to the manner and attitude with which American society treats Chinese immigrants, nor the status which Chinese will possess in America. Due to their belief that because China's air is polluted, the education system stressful, regional discrimination rampant, civil behavior lacking, and various other reasons, a sense of yearning for America permeates them. Their understanding and knowledge of America is very limited, usually coming from their Chinese friends, the internet, the TV and other unofficial channels or hearsay. However this type of information is one sided. Chinese parents don't hear about the kind of suffering, unfair treatment, and daily discrimination which shadows everyday life for Chinese immigrants. As for Chinese who grew up in America, the ABCs, or American Born Chinese, and the true circumstances of their lives, they have even less understanding of. So by what foundation do Chinese parents decide with such conviction that if only their children became "American," they would "definitely benefit more than they suffer?" (首先，着急移民美国的中国父母，大多时候，对美国社会对华裔的态度和待遇一窍不通。他们执着地认为，中国空气污染，教育系统压力重大，地域歧视泛滥，风俗不健康，人们普遍素质欠佳，等等原因造就了他们对美国的浓厚向往。他们对美国的知识和了解很有限，一般都是从其他中国朋友，网上，电视等等渠道听到的。但是这种信息来源是片面的。中国父母听不到美国华裔遭受的苦难和不公等待遇，各种日常生活之中的歧视。关于美国长大的 ABC （美籍华人）的生活真相他们更从来没接触过。所以中国父母有什么依据来一味，执着地认为让子女变成“美国人”就一定对他们将来利大于弊呢？)
To be honest, I seldomly, actually never, see ABCs personally step out and tell Chinese parents how they felt about growing up in America. This is probably because most of the Chinese kids who grew up in China typically don't understand much Chinese, since they were educated with American kids from a young age, through elementary school, middle school, high school, and lacked a Chinese friendly environment. Even if they dutifully attended weekend "Chinese school" to learn their mother tongue, it's not enough. Steadily they lose their Chinese language, so that even when they look Chinese, they cannot speak one lick of Chinese. These ABCs have no way to effectively communicate with their parents, much less express their true emotions on how it felt growing up in America. Rather, because Chinese parents don't hear their children's inner thoughts, they truly believe their kids all live spectacular lives, and that they've blended fully and seamlessly into America's mainstream white society. (实际上，我很少（甚至都没有）见到美国长大的ABC亲自站出来告诉中国父母他们自己在美国长大的感受。应该也是因为大部分在美国长大的中国孩子一般不会太多中文，由于他们从小就和美国孩子上小学，初中，高中，缺乏汉语环境，听不到看不见中文，哪怕周末再努力地去“中文学校” 补自己的母语也往往不够。孩子渐渐得就把中文完全忘光了，长的个炎黄子孙的脸，而一句中文都说不出来。这些ABC没法和他们的中国父母交流，更没法倾吐衷肠地将他们作为美籍华人真实的感受与他们的父母和来自国内的朋友分享。反而，因为中国父母听不到子女的心声，就误以为子女都活得非常滋润，认为子女一定已经完全融入美国主流白人圈子了。)
But ABCs in America on average don't really live the comfortable lives Chinese parents imagine. Just because most ABCs don't communicate their thoughts with the parents doesn't signify a superior lifestyle to kids who grew up in China. True, ABCs don't have to breathe China's polluted air, nor do they have to rack their brains memorizing Tang poems and Song lyrics. Yet those who grew up in America suffer from a more insidious form of psychological persecution : 1) a permanent cultural barrier, 2) a lifelong status as a second-class citizen (especially Chinese boys), and 3) a multitude of irremovable barriers to successful business ventures. In my opinion, the combination of these less apparent disadvantages constitute a very long-term form of pressure on children, so parents should at least make a real effort in understanding the concrete specifics of growing up in the United States. What's more, children should talk about these things, parents should listen, and not blindly deny experiences contrary to their beliefs in a selfish attempt to protect their dignity, and as a result abandon the child. (但是ABC在美国的生活普遍来讲并没有中国父母认为的呢么光荣滋润。就因为大部分ABC不和父母交流心声不意味着他们都活着比中国长大的孩子好。对的，ABC确实不需要呼吸中国污染的空气，也不需要榨尽脑汁披星戴月地被唐诗宋词。但是长在美国的ABC普遍遭受更隐形的心理迫害：1）永久的文化隔阂, 2) 终身摆脱不了的二等公民待遇（特别是华裔男生）, 及3）消除不掉的种种事业障碍。按我个人的看法，这些更隐形的弊端对孩子构成很长期的压力和迫害，父母至少应该深度了解一下孩子在美国的真实情况，多和孩子交流，多听听孩子的心声，而不要一味去否认这些负面因素，自私地为了保护自己的尊严而遗弃了对孩子的关照和协助。)
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