Been taking French classes for 3 years, but still can't muster the confidence to speak it. (When I do it's very lifeless and mechanical) Am I some kind of ignoramus?

Hello there. I have been taking French classes in secondary school for the past 3 years. I passed the JC OL exam with an A, and now I'm going to start the LC course. However it feels like I've made no progress. When I'm given a written assignment, I have trouble stringing together my own sentences without having to constantly refer to my textbook, a dictionary or a translator. I'm okay with aural stuff, but it's actually speaking the language that I struggle with.

It's hard to get together the confidence to actually talk in French. When I'm asked a question, I stumble, and my mind just starts malfunctioning, or that's how it feels anyway. If I do speak in French, I have trouble remembering verbs, what tense it is in, and oh boy, the pronunciation/accent. Even in my first language, English, my speech sounds awkward and mechanical most of the time. In French, it's just awful. Because of this, I just try to stay quiet so I don't look like a damn fool in front of 25+ people. Am I some kind of moron who shouldn't have chosen French in the first place? Is there anyone else who is experiencing this?

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