People have a variety of different reasons for why they may want to learn another language. Maybe they have moved to another country. Maybe they want to be better connected to their heritage.
For me, personally, the appeal in languages has always been connecting with other people. I have a very abusive biological family and there is a desire to have a place and soul family that will embrace me and love me for me. I remember as a teenager not being interested in any country that spoke English. I had this perception that a non-English speaking country was almost like another world and maybe even a better world for me to live in, much like now Harry Potter found Hogwarts.
I started out with French in high school and quickly became the best student in the class because I would research past the school lessons on the Internet. I haven't really traveled outside of my country, so the vast majority of my experiences with foreigners has been on the Internet, which may not be as meaningful as going to a foreign country, but it's definitely way more affordable and practical, so it's naturally going to be my experience.
I sometimes wonder why I'm not fluent in French, my (TL), by now. I should be. However, I think it's because I just don't have the motivation. Having a French speaking friend, even if they were fluent in English, would unquestionably accelerate me. And, while I've had some amazing interactions with native French speakers and while they are always impressed with my level of French and while they helped me with something that I desperately needed help with that no one else would help me, I have yet to meet someone who was a really loyal friend, someone who I just clicked and connected with, someone who I can always count on being there.
When I was a teenager, I read online that Denmark was the happiest country in the world. So, I thought that if I were there, I would find what I was looking for from Danish people. I even watched some YouTube videos to learn a couple words. However, being a teenager, I couldn't go to Denmark, so I had to resort to online, and I didn't meet anyone special, so I kinda dropped that.
Two days ago, I was on a video chatting app, which is something that I do very often. I have anxiety, don't like bars and I don't drink, so video chatting is the most personal form of communicating you can have on the Internet. Anyways, I happened to meet someone Denmark who I immediately had an incredible connection with us. We immediately clicked, which is very rare. Unfortunately, his Internet got disconnected and I didn't have the opportunity to ask for contact information to see if that is something that would last.
I was reminded of my teenage days and being obsessed with Denmark. I totally would study Danish if he were someone who I could speak to regularly. Even though he speaks English perfectly, I just feel that you connect with someone more deeply when you speak to them in their native language. There is something special about it, even if it is not always necessary.
Anyways, this is an interesting aspect to language learning that I don't see people talk about. Maybe no one else can relate to it, but language learning has always been done with an emotional motive for me as opposed to practical. Maybe not always. In the beginning, it was for a grade, but I quickly got far ahead, so I didn't have to think about that for very long.
It causes me to think. Should you wait to meet a friend first and then pick the language to study based off of the language that your friend speaks? I do not believe that you need to share a common language with someone in order to befriend. You can just feel when there is a bond and no words need to be exchanged.
Or, should you just choose a language and then meet people who speak the language you chose to study? If so, how do you decide? You may think that numbers is the most important criteria. It's logical. More people, more likely to find friends, right? However, a lot of people speak Arabic, but all the Arabic speaking countries are religious, which is a turnoff for those who dislike organized religion. They may have a greater chance of establishing relationships if they were in Iceland, even though relatively few people speak Icelandic.
It's just hard.
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