English is not my native language. But I started learning it when I was 6 or 7 years old, I really wanted to learn it and was highly motivated. Was the best student in my class and perhaps in the entire school. Also had a private tutor around the same time. Later I went to the US where I practiced it and then I just switched to it - I think in English, I write in English, it all came natural to me. But then I moved to France, been living here for more than a decade. I took private school classes, I had a private tutor, I had mandatory intensive classes from my local prefecture for a couple of months. A few years back I passed DELF for A2. Then I took another two courses, one in a local college, another with a language organization in Nice. And most recently, I took 3 months intensive class from Pole Emploi. Guess my exam result? it's still A2! At the same time, I understand Spanish, which I've never learned in my life, only watched movies, to the level close to A2. And I still can't speak even in simple phrases in French, can't construct them properly. I don't have any 'stage fright' nor that I care about my pronunciation or accent. It's just like I have a complete block or something. (TL)
What I think of it is that I really lack motivation, otherwise it's just hard to explain. I wanted to blame it on my age, but my Spanish example says it's not it. But the thing is that no matter how many hours I spent on learning French, all that massive amount of information I consumed, it just doesn't stay inside my head. No matter how hard I try. Most likely, deep down maybe I don't want to learn it. Anybody ever had that?
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