Weird feelings about heritage language

This might sound strange to some people, but does anyone else have any weird feelings surrounding a certain language?

I'm American, my mother is Italian and she taught my oldest brother Italian, but not me. I got berated as a child by my grandmother (who lives in Italy and speaks no English) for not being able to speak Italian, so it's sort of a sore spot.

I'm now thinking of moving there for university and I'm seriously studying Italian for the first time in my life and I have this weird guilt/anxiety surrounding it. Obviously I don't enjoy feeling like this, but I think I'll push through eventually. Has anyone else experienced anything like that?

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