Interesting Experiences Choosing Which Language to Speak

Growing up a native English speaker in America, you never have to choose which language to speak in any situation, since there's only one. I'm now learning German and living in Germany, and I'm interested and often confused by how people choose which language to use. Especially in multilingual areas or in immigrant or expat heavy areas, what are some interesting things you have noticed pertaining to which language people use in different situations with different people?

I'll share some of my own here:

Keep in mind these are my views as an expat myself.

Due to the history of Germany, it is sometimes seen as nationalistic to push German culture, including the language. This means that immigrants and tourists to Germany are not expected to know German, but rather English. Expecting someone to speak German when English is clearly the better option can be seen as rude, or at worst, racist or nationalistic. From the exact opposite side, someone who has immigrant parents but was born and raised here probably speaks better German than English. But, they may often be initially spoken to in English, which can also be rude since you are assuming they are an immigrant or expat when they aren't. While this doesn't cause many issues, the concept of it being rude to speak the wrong language (even though you both speak both languages) is new to me.

I also have friends that I primarily speak with in German even though their English is better than my German. I think this is because compared to most Germans, their English is quite bad, and, compared to most expats (Americans specifically), my German is quite good. This means that I may be more confident speaking poor German than they are speaking slightly better English.

Beyond this, It is interesting meeting people who also speak both languages. Usually one language just happens to be spoken first, and that ends up being the primary language we use, while using some of the other as well. With more recent friends, I tend to speak German, since I'm always getting more confident.

Generally, as the activities get less formal, I speak more German and less English. (at the bar vs going out for lunch vs in class)

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